You see ehn… Tolu’s aunty, Aunty Sade, no dey play. Woman wey go church 4 times a week and still dey cast demon on WhatsApp voice note.
But Tolu had grown bolder. After that corridor madness, she started “visiting” Kunle's room in the afternoon. Sometimes in shorts. Sometimes in wrapper. Sometimes with no intention of wearing anything for long.
One day, as fate would have it, Tolu forgot to lock the door. They were both in bed. Kunle had his lips between her thighs like he was praying in tongues. Tolu’s hands were gripping the bedsheet like NEPA just restored light.
Then it happened. Door: kpa! Voice: “Jesu!!!”
Kunle froze. Tolu screamed. Aunty Sade stood at the door holding a bowl of egusi and murder in her eyes. “Kunle! You dey use your preek to collect my niece destiny?!” She dropped the soup. It splashed. Tolu tried to cover her body with pillow. Kunle was already halfway under the bed like rat.
“You this Lagos girl, I warned you! First it was pant, now it’s the full show? IN MY COMPOUND?”
Tolu tried to speak. “Aunty I can expl—” Slap.
“Aunty please!” Kunle begged. But aunty had already removed her slippers. She chased him out of the room — still half naked. Neighbours started gathering. That was the last time Tolu “visited.” For two weeks, compound was dry. No moaning. No missing pants. Just silent tension.
Until one evening… Kunle saw a note under his door.
It said:
“Aunty is travelling next weekend. Keep your mouth ready. – T”
He smiled. The game was back on. To be continued…?
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The Panty Thief Of Surulere – Part 3: Aunty Sade Don Catch Them