*The First Lawmakers:* ```My Reflection on Home, Discipline, and Duty```
Law and order do not begin at the police station or the courthouse; *they begin at home, in the quiet corners where parents teach their children right from wrong.*
When this foundation *cracks*, society inherits *the fallout.*
As a police officer, I’ve witnessed this truth play out in heartbreaking ways—parents arrive at stations, *not with pleas for justice, but with demands for us to parent for them.*
“I want you to detain my child, I want you to discipline him.” “Torture him,” *as though pain alone could rewrite a life long gone astray.*
A retired soldier once came into my office in Ago Iwoye, demanding we kill his son, a university student arrested for cultism. His rage was volcanic. _Yet, the very next day, that same man returned, food in hand, asking after his son’s well-being._
When I joked, *“So you don’t want us to kill him again?”* his eyes betrayed a truth every parent knows: *anger is often the flipside of helpless love.*
Years later, I met that young man again in Shagamu. He’d survived his schooling, married, and become a father himself.
When I asked if he’d ever want his daughter near cultism, _his “No!” was instant._
Another father once begged us to help keep his drug-addicted son for weeks.
“Keep him here,” he insisted.
We refused—not out of indifference, *but because cells are not rehabilitation centres.* If anything were to happen to the boy, or if he escaped, *who would the father blame?*
The police.
Yet discipline cannot be outsourced.
*It must be nurtured, patiently and persistently, at home.*
This brings me to a delicate truth _: many of us grew up in an era where parents and teachers wielded firmer hands._
My own father believed in the “reset button” of a good beating— _a method he swore straightened my stubbornness_ (and yes, I laugh about it now).
Teachers, too, disciplined freely, with canes and stern words.
But times have changed.
*Today, some see corporal punishment as archaic, even abusive.*
I am not here to debate methods—what worked for one generation may not work for another. ```What matters is engagement.```
The problem today isn’t a lack of discipline; it’s a lack of presence. Parents once corrected their children directly, even if harshly. Some have handed that duty to strangers—teachers, police, and social workers.
```But no institution can replace a parent’s guidance.```
*A child raised without boundaries at home will test them elsewhere—* in cults, drug dens, or crime.
To be clear: I am not discouraging parents from reporting wayward children. If your son steals or your daughter vanishes, come to us.
We will help.
*But do not confuse reporting with surrendering.*
When you hand us your child and say, *“Fix them,”* you misunderstand our role.
We enforce laws; we cannot replace love. We investigate crimes; *we cannot teach values.*
The retired soldier’s son changed not because we jailed him,*but because his father chose to fight for him, not against him.*
Parents, hear me: ```society’s fabric is woven in your living rooms, at your dinner tables, in the quiet moments when you choose patience over fury, presence over absence.```
_The police cannot replace your voice._
_We cannot instil the values you withhold._
_Our cells are not classrooms; handcuffs are not teaching tools._
When you outsource parenting to the state, *you gamble with life—and with the peace of communities.*
Yes, parenthood is hard. It is exhausting, thankless, and often terrifying
. *But it is also sacred.*
```Your children watch how you love, how you forgive, and how you rise after failing.```
```They notice when you prioritize work over conversations, screens over eye contact, and fear over understanding.```
The boy who joins a cult, and the girl who slips into addiction—they are not born rebels.
*They are shaped by unmet needs, unheard cries, and lessons left untaught.*
To the father who sees his son slipping away: *Stay.*
To the mother who feels out of her depth: *Ask for help.*
To the parent who thinks it’s too late: It isn’t.
_Discipline without love breeds resentment_ , but ```love without discipline breeds entitlement```
. Find the balance.
*My generation’s parents were far from perfect, but they owned their role as first teachers.*
They scolded, they punished, and they stayed.
I urge present parents to do the same— *not with the harshness of the past, but with the wisdom of your own heart.*
Meet your children where they are. Listen. Correct and love.
I write this not as a Commissioner of Police, *but as a witness. I’ve seen the worst of humanity—and the best.*
_I’ve watched reformed cultists become devoted fathers._
_I’ve seen shattered families rebuild._
*Let us embrace hope and commit to being the first lawmakers in our homes.*
Parent Beware N Watchful