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So today, I met a Lecturer who told me he would not have a child because of what he did in the past.
I asked him if he was sick. He said no. Do you have a low sperm count? He said no. Are you impotent?
He chuckled and said to me calmly.
"Praises I am very very active down there. But I have decided to punish myself by not having a child until I leave this world."
I asked him why.
"Why would you make such a decision? Didn't God create us and say to us, go and multiply?"
He nodded his head.
"Yes. But in my case, I broke his rules."
I asked him how.
He told me that while he was a youth he met this particular woman whom he loved so much. The woman also loved him. He was 16 years old and she was 14 years when they met. At 17 he had already gotten her pregnant. By this time she was 15 years.
He was not ready to be a father and they both found a senior in their secondary school who helped them get pills to terminate the pregnancy.
When she was 19 years she got pregnant for him again. By this time he was 21 years old. He was just going into the university and still wasn't ready. She was preparing to write Jamb as well.
He talked with her and they both agreed to terminate the pregnancy again.
When he was 24 he got her pregnant for the third time. She had a complicated abortion which he promised was going to be the last. He was just rounding up his university and was still battling for his project money.
When he finished school, she was in her 300 level in school.
He was preparing for his NYSC and was to leave the following day. So he went over to her school to see her before he leaves. They both made love. A month after he was sent to Kebbi state to serve, he received a call from her that she was pregnant.
It was the fourth time.
He wanted to keep that one. But he knew he was not ready. He told her to decide what she wanted to do. Keep it or terminate it.
She was in her 400 level by this time and didn't know what to do. She took the same drugs she had always taken to terminate the baby. It was the 4th time. But one, that caused her to lose her womb.
Her parents never knew, but he knew about this and they both promised to keep it a secret. He promised to get married to her no matter what.
But she refused.
She told him she was not going to be married to him especially when she knew she may never have a child for him.
"Of what purpose is marriage, Usman? I will never be a mother. You will never have a child through me. So why marry? Why?"
They broke up and that was it.
Now at 51 years, he is still unmarried and has refused to have a child anywhere.
He said to me.
"Praises, as long as she is still unmarried and still has no child, my loins shall never produce any either. We messed up. I won't let her face it alone, I will face it together with her until the end."
I asked him where this lady is now.
He told me.
"She runs an NGO that takes care of pregnant teenage girls. She has 87 in her care."
I wanted to ask him if he has his own NGO that talks to teenage boys about early pregnancy.
But I closed my mouth.
Be careful of your actions today, so you do not spend the rest of your life regretting and paying the price tomorrow.

Omo